Open RP Post

[wuzzafuzzle]

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[cicatrize]

[ it had been that stupid grin. jack had been riled up in annoyance and anxiety, and when he'd glanced to david, finally, in his tirade, he saw that smile that lights up rooms and charms the pants off of reporters. in that singular instance, with just the two of them in the room, it occured to him acutely that he's the only one allowed to experience that smile in that moment. he has david and all of his beautiful radiance to himself, and he couldn't really help where his body led him next.

there's a kind of delicious and perfect warmth and affection in the way David kisses, slow and precise, languid and savoring every slip of lips and press of tongue. like jack's some exquisite dessert that he's in no hurry to finish. but jack's always fast and hard and passion like a crashing wave, and he can never stick with the pace too long. david's perhaps the only person he'll surrender control of things long enough to experience the sweetness of how he kisses, but even that has its limits. he never claimed to be patient. jack likes to possess him, likes to feel like he's the sole center of david's world and drag as much shudders, shivers, gasps and moans from him as possible.

jack sucks at his heated skin along the column of his neck, bringing up pretty rosy red marks that someone will have to dab make up over tomorrow, before lapping over it, kissing along the mark like it's something treasured. he can feel the flow of blood just barely beneath his warm skin, and every twitch of muscle and gasp for breath against his lips as he trails along David's throat, leaving open mouthed kisses and nips of teeth at the points he knows are most sensitive. he's traveling back to his lips again, possessing and swallowing everything that is so completely david down with every press of their lips and every brush and tease of their tongues meeting, exploring and tasting. it's not enough, and jack's so consumed with the soothing, warm desire for him that sits in as a heated weight in the bit of his stomach that he's pushing for more. fingers tug at his shirt and slip beneath to slide along the so smooth skin of his back, along his hips, wishing he could strip all of the annoying fabric between them away in an instant and have absolutely all of him.

but he knows when david says stop, that he means it. maybe with someone else, someone he didn't care about outside of carnality, he would have huffed and walked away at that point, looking for what he wants elsewhere. but david is what he wants. all of what he wants. he pauses, taking a moment to catch his breath and slow his ridiculously aroused and wanting body down (likely pretty evident to david with the way jack's pelvis is pressed up against his hip). after a moment, he nods, smoothing david's shirt back down and giving it a cute little pat. ] Okay.

[ it's breathless and husky, laden with lust, but he's not going to push, pressing slowed, sweet kisses innocently against david's cheek, nuzzling his nose behind david's ear. though, he is curious. it's not the first time david's stopped him from moving farther, and while he knows this is something new to david, and he's not near the kind of... experienced... jack is, it still worries him a little. there's a lack of trust there, and he knows, even with as close friends as they've become, it's there. thinking on it as he kisses along the side of david's cheek, down along his jaw, he mumbles some questions to him. ] Nervous? Afraid?

[ not with any kind of accusation or complaint. just concern. he hasn't ever been the most trustworthy, but of everyone, he wants david to believe in him. hands at his back knead at his muscles, and jack moves back to give him more space, away from the desk, and lets david lean more of his weight against him instead. the kisses he trails along david's throat as soft and simple, uncharacteristic of him, but not unsincere. ]

It won't hurt, I promise. Doesn't even have to be you. [ that's what most who haven't had sex with another man are worried about. david doesn't even have to bottom, if he doesn't want. not something jack offers a lot of people, but david's someone he trusts with it. ] We'll go slow. Nothing more than you want.

[cicatrize]

Don't be. [ Jack murmurs against David's throat, the tip of his nose pushing at the collar of his skin and trail sort, chaste kisses there, simple and slow and adoring. As much as he would love to have him bare and spread beneath him so he could lick and kiss and suck at every inch of his beautiful skin, he knows David needs time and Jack's completely fine giving it to him. But he doesn't want him apprehensive or worried. More than that, Jack wants to take care of him, in a way he's never really felt for another person before, not in this way. Michelle he's been protective of, sure, but David... he wants to be the one to be trusted, to give stability, and as much as it terrifies him, to be let in. David's something gorgeous and burning bright in a way that Jack both admires and feels completely consumed by. Drawn to like a child blinking at candle light against stained glass. Just wanting to bask in it. ] I'll take care of you.

[ He whispers it against David's jaw, a hand at his back holding him close and tight, supporting his weight and keeping him pressed firm against him, and the other carding through his hair, pushing fingertips along his scalp in rhythmic patterns, up and down again.

But it stalls, when Jack hears those words. A lot of ways to hurt. He knows what he means - Jack's frivolous, dismissive nature. How he uses and discards people. Manipulates them like puppets. Something he wasn't born with, something he learned from Silas and will now never be able to purge form himself. It's become part of his dna, like so many other unsavory things he wishes he could wash clean from himself. Or burn out. It's enough to have him freeze up and go rigid. He knows, with David's lips on his and his hands pressing reassurance against him, that it isn't meant that way, but it's a stinging spike in his chest, something that makes him feel utterly criminal. He's used to not being trusted, and for so long couldn't care less if someone didn't believe him or believe in him. But this is David, who Jack wants to deserve, wants to care for and to serve.

He has to pull back from the kiss for a moment, unable to process both at the same time, though his hands come to frame David's face, Jack's forehead pressed to his with eyes slipped closed, stinging slightly behind his eyelids. This hadn't started because of David - it had been Jack reaching for him, enamored with him, enchanted by the nature of him. He'd stepped into his father's line of fire to block David from it, ready to stand in front of the firing squad with him. 'Love' isn't a word Jack uses because he doesn't understand it, and he's afraid of it. Love is something that ties you to things, and leaves all the wounds in you open for prodding at. But David is enough. Enough and more, even if Jack can't decide what that is yet. ]

I won't. Not you. [ Hurt him, he means. Not in the way David's thinking of, and not any other. Jack's never had this before. Not this, not David, not something that filled every inch of him with warmth and affection and wholeness. It's a caring that Jack's never had before, that's simple and straight forward, and pushes past the layers and guarded shells of him directly to the center of him. With Joseph, it'd been different. Admiration and infatuation and Jack's allowance to be unguarded and unmonitored. With David, it's all of it, the complications, the cruelty, the bite, the damage, and the small part of him that want to grin stupidly back at David's goofy smiles and lame jokes. He wants to blurt all of that out to him, just in the stream of consciousness that runs through his head, but as his lips move so slighty, the words won't come. This isn't something Jack knows how to do. He wasn't built for this and trained for this like he was for Kingship. He was taught that his voice is something to use as both a knife and a shield. Nothing so soft and honest as this. ]

David. The clubs and... [ He tries, but stops short, because it all sounds stupid. Fabricated excuses and explanations, even if he can't think of what part of it wouldn't be truth, it still feels like a lie. ] It's not me.

[ But how does he really know? Hadn't he told Michelle before, that if you speak the lie enough, eventually you'll convince yourself of it? Hadn't that been the entire plan? Jack doesn't know who he is any longer. He hasn't for a long time, but he knows what's important to him. ]

I want you. I want only you. [ His eyes blink open, watching David, with a strain in his voice. ] Please.

[cicatrize]

[ David has never been nothing to him. He's been a savior, he's been the country bumpkin Jack was insanely jealous of, he's been his antithesis, and he's been something Jack couldn't hardly understand, but never nothing. Since the moment David dragged him out of that Gath tent, David was something. Maybe Jack still doesn't know what that is - love or some other kind of attachment or obsession - but he knows how he feels and what overflowing emotion it fills him with just to be in the same room as David, just to speak with him, or even text him. But he doesn't know what it means or if it's the right thing to feel. Rose and Silas didn't have the kind of storybook romance that are talked about in novels and movies and wedding ceremonies. He's never been close enough to that to understand it or connect to it, but he knows that David is the single most important thing to him. More valuable and coveted than anything Shiloh, Gilboa, or nations beyond could offer him.

Often enough, Jack thinks something in him might be inherently broken from the start. Things like love that so many people seem to understand on a basic, molecular, instinctual level that make no sense to him. Something illusive and frightening, and for the longest time Jack had decided he would be fine without it. Now there's David, and Jack would tie his soul to him if he knew how. If he could begin to guess. ]

Thank you.

[ He whispers quietly against David's forehead, pressing another kiss there as his fingers curl against David's cheek when he kisses his palm. Jack could thank him for so many things, really, as he has no idea where he might have ended up if David hadn't entered his life. Hadn't pried the humanity left of him out of the hole Jack had tried to bury it in. A hand tilts David's chin up, and the kisses he presses to his lips are soft and adoring, with some edge of need in it that Jack's typically too stubborn to admit to. His arm drifts to loop around David's waist again, beginning to walk them backwards, away from Jack's bedroom desk to the actual bed. The door ought to be locked, and if anyone comes knocking, he won't plan on answering.

As he leads him, his nerves start to spike, Jack's skin feeling too sensitive and mind too aware of all that he's doing. This isn't just sex - sex Jack knows, is familiar with, has got the process down. David isn't just an infatuation or an outlet or a fun time to have. He's David, and for a second, Jack's terrified. The back of his legs hits the edge of the bed, and Jack sits, pulling David close between his legs as he lays his cheek against David's stomach, breathing for a moment. ]

This is new for me too.

[ It's a quiet confession, and stiff. Awkward, like Jack doesn't really know if he's speaking in the correct language or not. But if there's only one person he's honest with for the rest of his life, he wants that person to be David. If there's anyone that will hear Jack's doubts and fears and uncertainties, it should be him. ]

I don't... [ The same issue as before - he knows what he wants to say, but not how to say it. ] I've never had... something like this.

[ Like you, he means, but for as well as Jack can craft words like spears and cruel traps, this isn't something he knows how to discuss. How to open up within himself. Lifting his head, he searches David's face, almost pleading. There was Joseph, yes, but it wasn't the same. It wasn't this intense want to be close, not even for himself alone, but for David - to give him the kind of care that he deserves. That Jack wants him to feel. ]

I want to do this right.

[ Jack's had so many things - assets, people, leverage - and none of it has ever really been his. All of it stripped from him in a single word from Cross or Silas. But David... David he wants to hold on to if he has to be dragged kicking and screaming from him. ]

[cicatrize]

[ Jack's eyes flutter closed as David trails affectionate, soothing kisses along his face, across his forehead, down his nose and over his cheeks. When he reaches Jack's lips, it's like breathing him in, and Jack's kissing him with as much of the love in him as he can put into action alone. He knows he wants to go further than that with him, twine them together and feel like he's lost in him, but he's starting to be a little scared. This is different from just the typical, simply carnal sex he's had before. Different, even, from Joseph, who was just fun and easy and didn't take anything from Jack to do. This is David, and it's all the passion and adoration and need he has for him. Jack's never been so raw and vulnerable with someone before, but he wouldn't have it with any other person.

David sinks lower, to his knees, and Jack's blinking at him, a bit dumbfounded, the thumbs at his hips sending a bit more warmth through him than he expects David meant to. His eyes follow David's hands only as long as it takes him to speak again - I'm not going anywhere. His chest seems to swell, and Jack hadn't even known how terrified he'd been of losing what's finally right in his life. So many other things have left him, or so many other things he's failed. He's petrified of the thought that the cycle would repeat with David. Of anything else in the world, he wants this one thing. Give the crown away, it's not what he needs any longer. It never was.

David's tugging at his laces, helping him get his shoes off, and Jack's just a bit dazed in watching him. It feels a little bit reversed, having David take care of him, in a sense. Generally Jack's the one pushing things along, dragging David behind him with encouragements and pleasant whispers. The make a clumsy clatter as David tosses the boots over his shoulder and Jack can't help the little smile for how David the action is. As is the simple, unconcerned way David presses his cheek to this inside of Jack's thigh, looking up at him like he's not in the most suggestive position in the world. Still, the words are sinking in to Jack more than the face he has the most beautiful man he's ever seen rubbing his hands up towards his crotch.

His head tilts at the confession, lips pulling into a smile that's a little tight with emotion. Maybe it's cheesy or overly romantic, but it has him feeling so intimately cared for a loved. Jack drifts a hand to David's cheek, running a thumb across his cheekbone as words he doesn't know how to say sit in the air between them. He feels like he should say something, push words out, something of the immense gratitude he feels for David to let him in like this, and like he has for the last several months. But he doesn't know how, really, and David's hands are trailing up his thighs in a way that has his muscles tensing and winding up with thrill that shoots through his nerves, acutely aware of every inch of his body that David's hands and fingers pass over.

Jack's breathing hitches a short moment, even as David's lips press to his, just before his hands change course, abandoning more sensitive skin to brace himself against the mattress. That wasn't fair. That was really not fair and Jack thinks David probably knows it. He's grinning right back into the slightly clumsy kiss, soon finding an easy rhythm between each other, as Jack hands find David's hips again. Fingers slip behind the soft cloth of his shirt, only sliding to his waist to give support as Jack starts to lean backwards to the mattress, tugging David gradually along with him.

The kiss is all slow, searing passion and sweet but yearning love. Not so carnal, not so much physicality. Just an overflow want for closeness, and Jack tries not to upset the kiss as he moves them, the way Jack tugs at David's lower lip and rolls it between teeth, sucking for a moment before moving back to slip his tongue along David's with a soft, pleased sigh. Eventually he's able to help David to lying with his back to the comfort, Jack to his side, raised up on a hip and braced by a forearm against the mattress near David's head. It's easy and simple, just that, what they're used to, and Jack's hand caressing along David's cheek, weaving in his hair, and slipping along the column of his throat. Eventually, his hand slips lower, tracing David's collar bones, and making a slow path over the smooth cotton of his stupidly attractive white sweater. That thing is incredibly frustrating, and Jack's a little glad that he'll get to drag it off of him shortly. Hopefully. If David doesn't decide to abort mission on this.

His fingers trace the lines of soft muscle under the shirt, softer than Jack's are but he's always liked David that way. Dragging along across to his side, he caresses down over David's waist, slimmer than Jack's as well, and brings his palm to rest flat over the lower part of David's stomach, just feeling him breathe for a moment. There's something of a pause there, as if giving David the moment to decide he doesn't want this. To push his hand away, or stop the kiss.

It doesn't come, and Jack's both excited and scared to be sharing something like this, something that actually means something with this boy he's admired and longed for and loved and felt entirely warmed by. His hand slips under the hem of David's shirt, around his waist and wraps around David's back to tug him closer, more flush against each other while Jack hooks a leg with one of David's leaning a bit more over him. ]